Some of you may have noticed that there is an election rapidly approaching –like a tornado with no shelter in sight. I’m not here to get hyperbolic about the impending end of civilization as we know it; I don’t think the outcome of this election will bring that on, at least, not right away.
(If you haven’t noticed, I’m not what you would call an optimist. Not exactly a pessimist either, but that’s a subject for another time.)
Truth be told, even for as seriously as I take my civic duty, I’m as ready for this thing to be over as – I think rightly – most of you are.
I think most adult Americans realize that a presidential election does move the needle, but not quite as much as the media and career politicians would have us believe. Still, an election – especially this election – is important.
Elections are important, even if you don’t think either of the candidates speak to your issues, because they both illuminate and channel the demeanor of the public. By that, and I think it’s obvious when one looks, I mean that who we choose as candidates is indicative of how we are thinking and feeling, as a nation. Also, who we choose to lead us is – to some extent – determinative of what we will consider praiseworthy behavior; that which we will aspire to.
So, I am not here to tell you who to vote for. I early voted, and if you’re interested, I’ll mention who for as a post script. What I am here to do – oddly free of spleen venting – is to talk about the kind of person we want as the focus of our admirations for the next 4 years, and maybe into the future, in a general sense.
If you look back at previous presidents, for the most part they embody a sort of collective ideal of the time. In that way who we elect to the office not just leads us but fundamentally represents us, as a nation, not just in the media or in classrooms, but to the world at large.
(I understand that, regardless of who wins this Tuesday, large portions of the U.S. will feel like their voice is not being heard and no one is speaking for them. That’s a valid gripe. Only way to fix it is to get educated, and get involved. Find others like yourself and get to the venues where what you have to say will be heard and will matter.)
I realize, while writing this, that is it difficult to elucidate my point without turning this post into an endorsement or execration. Truth is, for this missive, I’m not interested in doing either.
What I am interested in is asking you, dear reader, to think about what you want the very young of our country to see and imitate? What values do we want the children of this country to absorb silently and without effort? And what direction do we want to move the country in generally?
There’s a lot of political division in our country right now. I don’t think it really matters what label you give yourself. I think what really matters is how you want your country to look. And the president is the clearest symbol of what we value in this country.
Most of the time, I think the media tries to sell us on who gives the best speech, and what that means varies by which media company is trying to sell what air time to which sponsors. So, it can be difficult to really determine who a candidate is or where any given candidate stands on many issues – even the important ones.
But there is one thing we can see, regardless of media filter: behavior.
We can see behavior, and comportment, and demeanor. We can see if someone handles themselves with dignity, and respect, and grace – even if they don’t give a good speech and don’t have much in the way of charisma.
(On a related note, all the charisma in the world will not disguise an asshole. How many times have you said, of someone, “He/she is smooth, but such an asshole.”? At least once in your life, I’ll bet. And that’s what I mean; we all know if someone’s a cocksucker, even if they’re a charming one.)
Many of the changes we would like to see in this country – economics, equality, legalization, etc… – are slow changes and take a great deal of time to come to fruition. But the one thing that will change, instantaneously upon announcement of the election results, will be the example we set up for ourselves and our youth.
Do we want maturity, respect, responsibility, specificity, and adeptness?
Or do we want petulance, baseless assertions, bluster, mean spiritedness, and incompetency to be held up as the pinnacle of American virtue?
When we tell children that one day they could grow up to be president, what kind of president do we want them to think of?
What kind of president would we want them to be?
If you have not voted, or don’t intend to vote, please ask yourself this question.
It’s not difficult, and it won’t take long to answer.
At this point, it is literally the least you can do.
Please think about it.
Then go vote.
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P.S. I voted for Hillary. While she may not speak to my issues, (I was a Sanders supporter), and while I may have concerns about some of her ties to big business, she is, in my view, the more competent of the two. When in doubt, go with the one you trust to do the job best. Between the two, I trust her to be able to do the job, more than him. Sometimes the decision is just that easy.
P.P.S. Whatever happens on Election Day, good luck.
yestess 
Trigger Warnings…
UPDATE: 1/11/22-
I’m conflicted about this post. There are some good points and possibly some problematic ones. I think this one I need to leave, and trust you – dear reader – to make up our own mind. Also, I’m not hard to find, if you feel the need to contact me.
…Or: The Latest Cultural Artifact we’ve Run off the end of the Goddamn Earth with.
Disclaimer: If you have legitimate, no-shit, diagnosed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, I give you a pass on this – assuming, that is, that you are doing your part to seek help and get better. PTSD is not supposed to be a life-long condition. If you are suffering from it presently, please get professional help. If you need help to get help, then ask for it. Someone near you, someone you know and/ or love will help you find counseling. There are counselors out there, trained to deal with this kind of thing. Find them and use them. It will get better if you do. It will get better.
That being said, (and you know this is going to be a rant because I started with a disclaimer), I am getting sick of everyone and their mother talking about trigger warnings, or being triggered, or whatever new abomination to the English language the culture came up with since last I looked.
As I mentioned in the disclaimer, there are people who legitimately suffer from PTSD, and can be legitimately triggered. I don’t think the term is a made up term, but I think the extent to which it is bandied about, in social media and the media proper, in everyday conversations, and on college campuses, demeans and degrades the very real, but fairly rare psychological condition.
(Much the same way it became fashionable for control freaks and neat freaks to talk about their “OCD”. Fuck you. When you wash your hands until they bleed, and can’t stop, then tell me you have OCD.)
Here’s what I have noticed, a lot of the talk about “triggering” in its various forms appears to boil down to:
1) Something is making me uncomfortable,
and
2) I shouldn’t have to be uncomfortable.
Another phrase I’ve heard strewn about like glitter in a skanky strip club is “invalidating my experience”.
Huh?
What?
I didn’t quite catch that. Someone invalidated your experience? So, you’re telling me you are a moron who can’t tell the difference between what happens outside your head and what happens inside your head?
Because, and let me be perfectly clear here: no one can invalidate your experience!
It’s an experience, and it’s past tense. It’s already happened. You were there, weren’t you?
No one can invalidate or even devalue your experience(s). It can’t be done. Someone may convince you that you should value any one of your experiences less or more than you do, but it’s still you that decides whether or not the value of your experience changes.
Have we become so easily led as a people that now we’re allowing others to determine, for us, what we think about what we’ve experienced?
(Okay, don’t answer that. In fact, don’t think about it too much right now. There’s still more words on this page to read before the rage-blood starts shooting out of your nostrils.)
Back to my point of digression; most of the talk concerning triggering seems to be people using the term as an intensified substitution for the phrase: made me feel uncomfortable.
(By the way, I think it can be reasonably argued that, if you use an intensified substitution to amp up the effect of your words, you may already be invalidating your own experience. Let’s face it, outside of entertainment purposes, if you thought it had value and impact, you wouldn’t need to use a more intense word, would you?)
Here’s my question: When did we become such a nation of cowards that we can’t stand to be uncomfortable?
Because that’s what all this, non-legitimate, whining about triggering is; a bunch of cowards who can’t stand to be uncomfortable.
(Note: I know that some racist, sexist, homophobic genital wart of a human being is going to take my statements here as some kind of license to continue with their douche-bag fuckery. It is not my intent to give these human puss stains ammunition for their irrational prejudices. The fact that some day, some one might fills me with existential loathing, but that, dear readers, is the subject of another rant. In any case, I’m making a point about distinction, not trying to bludgeon people who are marginalized or suffering.)
Here’s the thing: for the most part, for most of us, life is going to be uncomfortable. Dealing with it; getting by and getting over is part of what life is all about. Part of the meaning is the struggle. We shouldn’t be running from discomfort, we should be embracing it. Discomfort, when confronted and overcome, is the stimulus that helps a human being grow. It makes us strong. Discomfort tests us and molds us and hammers out impurities in our character. Discomfort chips away the inessentials until we are truly ourselves.
Discomfort is our greatest teacher and ally. And the moments we are uncomfortable are the most potentially learning filled moments in a human life time.
Being uncomfortable, if you engage with it, makes you better.
But say there is a person, or a group, behaving in a way that makes you uncomfortable. Perhaps they are being racist, or xenophobic, or whatever the newest flavor from the prejudice of the month club is. Suppose you’ve been taught to be polite. To not ruffle feathers or make a scene. Then suppose the behavior is just too damn inappropriate.
As Bruce Lee said, “Learn to accept things. And learn to accept the fact that, some times, you will not be able to accept things.”
So, say someone is being a real flaming shit-bag, and if you want to know what to do when said burning bag of excrement behaves inappropriately, here’s what you do: Speak up.
Speak up. Stand up. Step up.
Use your intelligence and your wit to make that person or group look as ignorant, mean, hateful, and foolish as they well and truly are.
“But what if they get violent?”
So what. If it gets violent, then get violent. Or not. it’s your decision to make in the moment.
But take a stand, in that moment, and do something. And damn the consequences.
Maybe you get verbally abused for it. Who gives a fuck?
Maybe you get physically abused for it. Again, who gives a fuck? If you’re not willing to stake a little of your flesh on it, then I question how deeply you hold the conviction.
Let me remind you of what having the courage of your convictions looks like:
Civil Rights Protestors of the last century.
They knew they would be sprayed with high-pressure water hoses. Knew they would be taunted, humiliated, beaten and arrested. Knew they would have police dogs set on them.
You know what they did?
They marched on. They sat in. They made their statement, regardless of the consequences. And they made a difference.
I’ve never read or listened to a single interview where even one of those protestors talked about being “triggered”.
“You got beat up and arrested yesterday for marching. What are you going to do today?”
“March some more.”
That’s courage. That’s what this country used to aspire to. Victims deciding to be heroes, regardless of what it cost.
This cultural phenomenon that is “triggering” is a coddling, insecure, infantile desire to be insulated from any and all discomfort. To not have to be bothered with standing up, with showing courage, with enduring whatever comes to be able to make a difference.
For the sake of our culture, and for the sake of those who actually suffer, we need to get a fucking grip.
And soon.