APOCALYPSE – a Greek word meaning revelation of things unknown.

First off, calm down.

Seriously.

Calm. The Fuck. Down.

(And wash your damn hands!)

Second: This is not the end.

and louder for those in the back:

THIS. IS. NOT. THE. END!

It really isn’t.

It might feel like it, especially if you’ve watched any of the president’s press conferences.

But it’s not the end.

What it is is a genuine Apocalypse: a revealing of things unknown.

(Now, to whom, exactly, they were unknown is a shifting thing, depending on the subject, but none of us knew them all, so it still counts.)

So, I’m compiling a bit of a list, so that most of the newly known things get out to the people who don’t yet know them.

Things like:

I bet you didn’t realize how often you touch your damn face until you tried to stop doing it.

Okay, so that’s a silly thing, and this list isn’t exactly silly, except when viewed from a severely jaundiced point of view – but gallows humor is a friend of mine, so I indulge it.

Here’s another: Funny which jobs are considered essential services isn’t it? Less funny when you realize medical professionals make up a smaller percentage of that group than say, convenience store clerks, grocery stockers, and Walmart cashiers. Maybe if they’re so essential – which by now you know they fucking are – maybe they should get paid a living wage to do what they do for our society? Maybe, just maybe, if someone works any job for 40 hours a week, they should be able to make a decent living off of it? Something to think about.

Related to that last point: if you didn’t know there were a bunch of Uber-Capitalist scum-fucks willing to sacrifice you and yours on the altar of profit, after watching about 2 hours of any “conservative media” – like, for instance, Hastur, Hastur, Hastur News, or the unfair and imbalanced network that shall not be named – you’ll no doubt have seen the people, including the President, suggesting that you should risk dying, and killing others, including the ones you hold most dear, to go back to work so the fucking stock market will go back up.

I’d have more to say about that, but it makes me too fucking angry.

And those aren’t the only carpet-bagger slug snot profiteers out there, no. Plenty of religious and conspiracy nuts are running head-long to Religious Barkers and Professional Conspiracy Theorists, and all of those cocksuckers have something they want to sell you, from supplements, to colloidal silver for you to drink – do not drink colloidal silver unless you’d like to spend the rest of your life looking like a fekkin’ Smurf – to food buckets, to shiny new tinfoil hats. None of which will help you. Neither will essential oils, Himalayan salt, or prayer cloths. Save your money for toilet paper, if you can fucking find any because people are generally easy to spook and panic bought that as opposed to canned food, dried beans, and rice.

Other revelations:

Most of our elected officials are useless panderers.

(I know, most of you knew that before, but some didn’t and they’re getting a brutal awakening during this crisis.)

Most people don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about, especially when it comes to the current pandemic. (Always do your own homework, folks. Always.)

Your cable provider is likely not giving you the download speeds you’re paying for.

Oh, and something else, something BIG:

You know how the government and various news stations and your least favorite uncle at the family reunion keep telling you we can’t end homelessness, or hunger, or student debt, or provide healthcare for everyone because “It’ll cost too much!”

Yeah, after the Federal Reserve magicked up 1.5 Trillion to dump into the stock market to shore that up, and then the government passed a 2.2 Trillion stimulus package – which is only supposed to be the first of many, by the way…

Yeah, now we KNOW that’s all bullshit.

We can afford it, if it profits the wealthy. No problems there. No debates. No consultations. No town halls full of questions and the inevitable yelling.

Nope.

Nothing.

Just pulled that shit out of a hat.

(The part that got the argument: the unemployment part. The part that helps poor and working people. That part some of our conservative representatives wanted to argue about – because they thought it was too much. Just fucking take that in for a minute, then go clean the blood out of your eyes.)

And maybe, beyond our government’s incompetence, the fatal profit motive of the super-rich, and other examples of human kind’s general inhumanity to fellow humans, maybe that’s one thing we should remember going forward:

That we have the ability, almost overnight, to summon up the money to end hunger, homelessness, poverty, and sickness. To rebuild our infrastructure, put every American back to work, and avert a climate disaster all at the same time.

We could do it tomorrow.

Easily.

And we don’t.

Okay, one last revelation for you, maybe the most important:

The only value worth voting or working for is whether or not we choose to help and take care of each other. Every other value you can name stems from that simple, basic fact.

This Shitty Apocalypse™ has revealed to us that we no longer hold that truth to be self-evident.

Maybe it’s time we thought about why; individually and as a nation.

I’ve spent a great deal of time pondering it lately.

Now it’s your turn.

Good luck.

Until next time…